Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Dreams I have had about my father.


I want to briefly discuss some weird dreams me and my family members had when my dad passed away when I was 15 years old. I'm not opposed to thinking that dreams could have a deeper meaning. However, I think that those dreams are a rarity and are far and few between so to say that these accounts of dreams have deeper and truth behind them is a stretch. However I do know that these dreams reach farther then my consciousness could think.
                The day my dad died me and my sisters all had dreams about him for the following year. My dreams were usually painful and just but flashes of him and I would usually wake up crying it felt that these were not just my emotions but on some level that it was too hard to talk to me. Then later on as my grieving process matured I would have dreams that he were alive and that there were other people in my mind when I knew he was dead trying to tell me that I was crazy and there was no way he was dead. Then as they happened later in life I would be forced to tell him to his face that he was dead and that the dream wasn’t real.

When my sisters had dreams about him he would in detail have conversations with them.  I can’t remember all that they told me, but he told sister one that he talked to sister two and sister two that he talked to sister one. He would tell them that he couldn’t communicate with earth and that seeing earth would be like having a dream here.  He also said that time wasn’t the same there as it was here. Some interesting things that would happen in their dreams, is that my sister would have to point him out in the dream if she wanted to talk to him. As if he was some abstract part of the dream like walking in the crowd and then she would point him out and he would say “Hey, you found me now I can talk to you”.

There was a lot more conversations in the dreams but I can’t remember all that I was told or my sisters were told and some of its personal so it would not make sense to someone else reading. Anyways these are some of the ideas and emotions I’ve felt. After   I woke up from the dreams it’s the weirdest feeling that I have ever felt and it’s something I don’t ever think I could re-experience in any situation. Some other people not related have had similar dreams of my father.  It’s nice to have these dreams because sometimes I feel as though I have lost the influence of him on my life and even though I might not be thinking of him it’s good to know that my sub-conscious mind is and that maybe he is.

12 comments:

  1. James, this is wonderful. Expressing something like this isn't always easy, but it is really helpful to healing. :)

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  2. dreams are often so weird to me i wake up and have no idea why i had them, they are so weird i almost always don't think anything of it

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  3. Not really sure of what to make of dreams but it's nice to read something like this.

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  4. I don`t really know what to think of these. I have lately dreamed about my dog a lot. He went missing in November and I sometimes see him coming back.

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  5. First off, I offer my condolences to you and your family. It's hard to lose someone who has been so close to you personally.

    Second, things come and go and they always will, always have and we can't do anything about it, took a while for me to realise this too.

    Lastly, I don't think your father would very much appreciate you and your family mulling about his passing. Think about it, I bet he'd rather see you guys happy than sad about the whole situation.

    Don't be thinking about the dreams or his death but rather such a person lived.

    Peace

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  6. It's been a while since my father has died and this was an objective piece about the forms my grieving process has taken. Everyone goes through it in different forms I think writing about the forms would hardly be mulling. In fact I think that would be a great leap; people that bottle up there emotions and do not face or see where they come from or what they have learned from there past often have a harder time moving forward. What the piece was about was how everyday my memories of him fade as I get older but no matter how I mature and become more independent he is very much a part of me and my sub conscious that will always be touched. I think he would be happy about all the decisions I have made, how his death accelerated my maturity and for the most
     part he would be proud no matter what path I had chosen as long as it were my own. I hope people that read my blog can learn something about the grieving process and be more informed about how they could respond to their thoughts no matter if their thoughts are uncontrollable. A negative way to take these thoughts would to think less of the person who wrote it. If you try to be an informed reader there is always opportunity to learn from experiences. Me reflecting on the dreams is not reflecting on his death but reflecting on what has manifested inside of peoples emotions. If you got the idea that I wanted you to feel sorry for me I'm sorry you got the wrong impression this is just my JOURNEY! I'm glad however for your feedback and your critical thinking.

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  7. I had 4th grade teacher in Catholic school who intepreted dreams like this as the spirit of the person coming to let him know they were doing alright. I have had both dreams of people I know who I dreamt they died, and then was relieved to wake up and find it was a dream...and then I have had dreams about people I lost...and then wake up, and say "aww shucks" it was a dream. I rarely have the experience of realizing it was a dream, and then arguing with the figments in the dream that they are not real, .... but that is a pretty interesting aspect of your dreams. interesting post fer shure.

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  8. This is really touching...dreams are pretty amazing!

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  9. This is very cool that you are able to write about your dad, I remember the day like it was yesterday, everyone is always here for you. Your dad is probably very proud of the person you have become. I didn't know him very well but I do know that he made a difference in people's lives, what a great man to have such an amazing impact on everyone's life

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